"The Darker Side of Gold" ~ From an anonymous Weyrwoman

With every Search cycle in which there is a gold egg on the Sands, the SC of any given Weyr will find itself receiving applications from people who want to ride a gold dragon. There's a word for these people. They're called 'masochists.'

Yes, I say that facetiously. Most of them aren't masochists; they're starry-eyed new players who've dreamed of Impressing a gold dragon since the first time they read the Pern novels, or more experienced players who've worked, improved themselves, and finally feel ready to try for that big shiny puppet that will prove they've *made it* as a MUSHer and RPer. People who try for gold without ever having ridden one before aren't masochists. It's the ones who've already been goldriders once, and now want to give it another go, who surely have to be into self- punishment.

More facetiousness? Yes and no. There are many, many good things about riding gold. They're no secret, and I'm not going to get into them here. But there are also many, many bad parts to balance those out... and when you take them all into consideration, it's a wonder anyone would *want* the job more than once. It's a wonder anyone would want it at all.

Let's take your application for starters. From the moment you apply as a gold-first Candidate, you're giving the Search Committee an impression of yourself. They are going to look at the reasons you want that particular color of dragon with a heavily jaded eye more often than not. You're interested in adminship? Uh-oh. You're a potential power-hungry maniac. You want to ride a color that's different, unusual? Oh, look, it's another would-be golder who thinks she'd be *special*. You want the IC prestige? Oh, no, not again--you must be of those who'd be sticking her nose in the air and claiming to be better than everyone else within minutes of Impression. You think you 'deserve' a gold after a long time riding metallics? My, that's rather uppity, isn't it? Such a big ego is never a good sign... and so on, and so forth. Faranth help you if you go gold-only.

But let's say that you're good. You're very good. And not only that, but you're a pleasant, reasonable person, and manage to impress the SC to the point that they can look past that negative first impression and start to give you serious consideration. There's still the opinions of the other Candidates to consider. I can practically guarantee you that there will be at least one who can tell you're going after gold and will start looking for your flaws--particularly if she's a potential golder herself.

Then let's say you Impress the queen. Congratulations. You now have at least one person who's concentrated so heavily on your flaws that s/he will probably be outraged that you got the gold. If there's only one, consider yourself blessed by whatever power you believe in. Chances are good that this person will be a Weyrling him/herself, and s/he may well make life difficult for you.

That's just one prospective problem. There's also the probable cry of favoritism. If you lived at the Weyr before your Impression, or worse, were even a remote friend of the WLs, this is almost guaranteed to happen. MUSHers tend to be a cynical lot when it comes to Hatching results--with good reason, unfortunately--and a connection to the Weyrleaders looks verrrrry suspicious in a new goldrider. Sometimes people will leave the Weyr or drop their characters entirely if they don't feel good about the latest gold Impression. This can breed resentment. Learn to live with it. Resentment will probably always be a part of your online life... at least with a goldrider character.

Remember: in Impressing gold, you've Impressed the color that most people consider to be the top of the line, and a sign that you're the best of the best. There are going to be riders who find it ridiculous that you ride a gold and they do not. There are going to be Candidates left Standing who find it outrageous. There are going to be people who never even made it to Candidacy who are dead certain that a ten-months- deceased goat would make a better goldrider than you, and certainly *they* would. Maybe none of them will ever tell you so; maybe none of them will ever tell anyone else so. But this is not really all that likely.

"All right," you say. "That sounds nasty, but I think I can handle it. That means I should have no problems, right?" Wrong-o. There's more. Even if you're God's gift to the MUSH and everyone adores you when you Impress, you can still muff it up in the blink of an eye as a Weyrling. All eyes will be on you; people will want to know what sort of goldrider you are going to be. This means: act arrogant ICly or OOCly, be rude, break rules, bend canon, be too silly, be too humorless, be exclusive, and you risk becoming unpopular quickly depending on just what you've done. A goldrider cannot *afford* too much arrogance. Maybe, once you're a full rider, you can stick your nose in the air now and then-- but do so while you're a Weyrling, and you'll have people muttering about what a mistake it was to Impress someone so uppity. A goldrider cannot afford to be rude. No matter how obnoxious the newbie, how irritating the resident, how cantankerous the rider, if you can't say something reasonably polite, you'd better not say anything at all. A goldrider can't afford to be a troublemaker if she ever wants to make senior. A goldrider can't afford to alienate the Weyr's people.

Maybe you don't care what everyone else in the Weyr thinks of you? Don't you dare apply for gold, then. On most games, Junior Weyrwoman is an administrative position. The administrators of an area are expected to--repeat after me--*serve their area*. The Weyr and its residents do not even remotely exist to serve you, whether you are junior or senior. *You* are there to serve *them*. That doesn't mean that you have to take every harsh word to heart (doing so will probably make you just as unfit as not giving a rat's rear, in fact), but you should be considerate of the Weyrfolk and of the well-being of the Weyr itself. A poor goldrider can make the entire Weyr look bad.

Maybe you wouldn't have any problems staying polite and well-tempered. Good for you! If only that were enough, even combined with those wonderful RP skills, to keep the difficulties of gold away. You probably want to have a clutch of your very own, right? News flash: that might be years in coming. Very few new goldriders get to have a clutch right away. Patience is never more a virtue than when you ride a queen. And then there's the question of roleplay. What, precisely, *is* your position? You wouldn't be the first junior to wonder: Junior Weyrwoman is a vaguely-defined role, and you will have none of the duties of a Wingrider to play around. You also will not have many Wingmates, and the sense of community that your clutchmates will find in their Wings will be mostly absent for you.

You've been patient, and have stayed active for some time after your Hatching. Congratulations: you get to have a clutch. This should be all fun and games, right? An event all for yourself, a spectacle you get to run entirely? Keep on dreaming. In certain circumstances, this may be the case--but a Hatching is a lot of work; goldriders who get stuck with the burden of an entire clutch aren't likely to last to their next. You're luckier if you have plenty of help. Of course, a helpful SC is more likely to mean that you not only won't get any major say in who Impresses, but you won't even get final say on clutch theme, Hatchling theme, names, or possibly even clutchsire. Your Weyr may need a new gold; that means you're restricted to the bronzes. Not all flights are well- attended, either. You may find yourself to have no option but to choose someone you don't particularly care for... and that will put you in close contact, ICly and OOCly, with that person for the duration of the cycle. Grit your teeth and deal. You won't have a lot of choice. And as if all of this weren't enough, your Weyr may decide that they want to do a style of Hatching--random, colorless, what have you--that you personally despise. Tough luck; you're still obliged to play along.

Those are the problems that may face you if you're a *junior*. What if you're senior? Oooh, boy. You'll still have all of these problems, plus ten times more.

Every decision you make will displease someone. Your choice for WL might get you flayed by your residents. Any change will likely meet with resistance. You can and will be personally responsible for misery on the part of your people. For delight, too--but the memory of misery lingers a lot longer.

Hatchings are a prime example. When you're senior, even though the decisions will have been made by the SC (and if you promise the SC that they'll be the ones making the decisions, you'd *better* deliver), you are the person most apt to get all of the blame. Anything about the Hatching that isn't liked, from Impressees to code problems to delays, is All Your Fault when you're the Weyrwoman. The bitter non-Impressees will sometimes demand you tell them why they're not heading to the Barracks now while you're still doing the post-Hatching work. You will find your name dragged through the mud. The accusations of favoritism, of bias, unfairness, everything, will come back from a new angle. You will almost undoubtedly be someone's personal Antichrist, and that's a very uncomfortable position to be in.

And do you remember that wonderful thing called RP? You won't have much time for that anymore, so kiss the greater part of it good-bye. As if that's not bad enough, people will be *expecting* you to RP more than ever, and will not greet your scarcity with pleasure. If you're not one of those rare sorts who can balance duty and pleasure, you're apt to find even more people becoming disaffected with you. Those supporters that remain aren't necessarily the truest--your *true* friends are going to, more likely than not, yell at you for something at some point or another. Anyone who adores everything you do is more apt to be a yes-man or yes-woman than someone you really want to have at your side or your back. (There could be exceptions to this, but the need to be wary around everyone is another price of goldriding.)

All of this has a very negative sound. It is meant to. Not every goldrider will face all of these problems; some may even face none of them, but it is better to be prepared when you're bracing yourself to walk through the valley of the Shadow of Dea--err, apply a queen dragon. Remember these things, when you put gold as your first preference on a Search application... and remember, too, the good things, the things which made you want that puppet in the first place. Judge for yourself whether the one is worth the other. And if you decide that it is, then perhaps you, too, will join the proud ranks of the masochists.