"Being happy on a gold" ~ Saskia, Gold Rinath's rider @ Telgar Weyr, PernMUSH

Most of the other  posts focused on how tough it can be to be a goldrider, but I know many of  these folks are quite happy to ride gold, or they wouldn’t be around  long.  So I’d like to tell you how you  can be happy on a gold. I’ll discuss what I think are the key characteristics  necessary for being happy on a gold, (or even trying for one), talk about stereotypes  and how they can be fun, and end with why I like riding gold. 

First in  fairness, I’ll define in rough order of importance what I think are the characteristics   of someone who’ll be happy on gold.    If you don’t possess these qualities and you’re happy on gold, okay, but  this is my experience and observation after years of M*ing on different Pern games,  and riding golds on various MUSHes.    Your mileage may vary.

1. Online self-esteem – You don’t have  to believe you’re a goddess on gold, but if you have to receive validation   from others on a game to feel good about yourself, you’ll be very   unhappy on gold. While on the surface, a gold might feel like a boon to   one’s self-esteem, and it is a thrill to receive one.  After all a while, the glow fades, and most  goldriders realise it’s a shiny puppet that often makes you a target for  others.  If you don’t believe in  your online self, you’ll be very unhappy, because people will find your weak  points and attack you for them.
2. Online self-confidence – Maybe you   lack self-confident in other aspects of your life, but online at least,  you must feel you’re at least as good as any one else and you have a  right to be there.  People will  not listen to you or respect you if you don’t respect yourself. Riding a  gold is not for the faint of heart.
3. Strong sense of your character – If   you don’t know who your character is, you’ll get lost in the undefined role  of Junior Weyrwoman and other people’s expectations of  you.
4. Love of the Weyr community and ability   to work with the admins of the Weyr – If you don’t have this, you’ll   burn out very quickly.  And of course   you need to do what’s best for the Weyr.    In the end, the Weyr is much bigger than you are.
5. Strong separation between OOC and IC   – Sometimes you have to sacrifice IC RP for OOC constraints.  For example, if you’re a Senior, you may have to  choose someone who’s a strong admin, but your character doesn’t  like.
6. Ability to balance RL and MUSHing and   to keep things in perspective – It’s only a game, but also immensely   important to people including you.   Why else would you put the effort into trying for a gold? Being an active  gold requires a lot of time. RL comes first, so sometimes that means  you’ll have to retire, go on vacation, etc.  You need a sane way of dealing with this.  You    need to be grounded in reality.
7. Ability to make decisions and stand   behind them – You need this to be a good admin.  One of those decisions for you is ‘do I really want a  gold?’
8. Ability to listen and to stay calm   under pressure – Again, maybe you’re not the best at this in RL, but   it’s easier with text. And you can always take a break. Also needed to be a   good admin. It’s also needed to be a gold candidate.  IMO being a gold candidate is far more stressful  than being a Junior weyrwoman.  It  feels like all eyes are upon you in both cases, but as a junior, you can make mistakes.  While no-one  wants to be criticized, your harshest critics may have something useful for you  to learn, and you’ll never find out if you don’t  listen.

Notice in none of  this, did I say popular or nice. I am not popular. There was another candidate who  Stood with me who was immensely popular, and a lot of the Weyr was convinced  would get the gold, but she didn’t. I happen to be nice, but some of the  most successful Weyrwomen I’ve seen are not nice at all.  IMO the key is to a good leader is to command respect,  and not worry about love.

To be honest,  sometimes being nice is an absolute liability.  Shandra once said to me that “To be a goldrider is to play with  people’s dreams.” Most people who Pern dream of Impressing a dragon.  So a hatching involves high  emotions: joy and sadness.  You’re going  to thrill some people and greatly disappoint others.  I think those who have a tougher skin fare better than I do who  usually feels bad to hurt someone’s feelings. On PernMUSH, we used to have a  greater variety of Weyrwoman: some quite mean and others extremely nice, and  they all seemed to do fine.

So let’s talk  about stereotypes.  Don’t think  that just because you Impress gold, your character will have to become a nice “hostess   with the mostest”. Nor does it necessarily mean your dragon will be dignified,   grumpy, and/or diplomatic .  Rinath   is none of these things.  In fact   she’s brutally honest, extremely silly, boisterous and loves to tease others and  herself most of all.  She delights in  things like pretending to swoop down on unsuspecting people.  Other than being babysitter to an egg machine and  ‘helper to the Senior’ the role of a junior is not well-defined.  If you have a well-defined character and dragon, this  can be a lot of fun.  And no, this  doesn’t mean your character has to have well-defined goals.  Sometimes the best RP comes from when your character has no clue   what’s going on.  Saskia tends to   blunder through life a lot of the time.

And that’s why  I love riding gold.  You can make your own  way.  You can have fun with the various stereotypes and IC constraints.   I had fun as a weyrling trying to figure out what to do when the others were  chewing firestone. And then there’s the wonder of hatchings.  Yes, they’re a lot of work, but I love them. I had a  blast when Rinath had her PC hatching, but I had a lot of help. 

Leading a Weyr  is, yes, a thankless job, but I believe it can also be useful in RL. You can  experiment with different leadership tactics and strategies.  You can work on various skills such as diplomacy,  negotiation, and patience that you can then apply to RL.  Just like managing people in RL, the people you lead have other  options and can leave you, or you can improve their VR lives through your  efforts.  I know several Senior Weyrwomen  who decided to go into RL management after managing a Weyr.  I’m not saying it’s the same thing.  For example, few people will yell at their boss, but you  can learn a lot in the M* lab.

But in the end, I  admit going for a gold is not particularly logical. The logical thing to do if  you want to lead or have hatchings is to try to Impress bronze.  The odds are much greater both  that you’ll actually Impress, that your dragon will be on the sands with a PC  clutch, and that you’ll lead a Weyr. However there’s just something about the  whole experience of riding gold.

I really get a  thrill out of knowing that my dragon is mother to PC dragons out there. That’s not  to say that being a daddy is any less, but I’m female IRL, so don’t have  the same feelings about that.  And it  is a dream. I must admit I was totally blown away when I Impressed Rinath. She was  just so perfect that I sat there, stunned and unable to type for a few minutes  until someone paged me and asked if I had seen the Impression message. Jehrina described to me how her hands froze when she Impressed Leilanth. And so  if after reading all this, it resonates with you and you still want to  pursue that golden dream, I say ‘Go for it!   Best of luck to you!’